On the Events of Yesterday
Traffic was bad last night. So I didn't get home until 8pm. By which time my Son was in bed, so I didn't get a chance to speak to him. It seems that he was naughty at school. Pushing, spitting, and hitting at another boy. He'd forgotten about it all this morning. Took him a while to remember what he'd done.
It seems that the other boy, let's call him Ben, had started with scratching. They used to be friends, but then Ben, and I'm at a loss to understand the mechanics of this, turned into a bit of a bully. Now Ben won't stop being naughty, and won't go away. Yesterday my Son simply reacted in kind - understandable - but I'm far from happy about it. So I quickly ran through the How to Deal With Bullies speech.
The speech is different every time. But the basics are always the same. First the rules:
- Ignore the bully.
- Walk away if you have to.
- Don't get angry or upset.
- Don't hit back.
- Tell somebody
Then the reasoning:
- Do otherwise and you're just letting the bully know their actions are okay.
- Do otherwise and you provide them with exactly the sorts of entertainment they crave.
- Do otherwise and and when all is said and done you will be just as naughty as them.
Of course I usually forget one rule. The fact that - unlike the rest of the rules and reason - I didn't work it out for myself probably speaks volumes. But my Wife usually remembers and chips-in:
- Go find your true friends.